i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
