Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Randomize
