My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Randomize
