if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
did i walk over a car last night?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
