Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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