I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
