Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
soo... how was my night?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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