Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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