weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
