Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
