Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
