WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
