dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
