Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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