The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
