I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
