We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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