I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
