It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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