Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Randomize