i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I wish they made helmets for livers.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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