i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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