found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
