Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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