Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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