He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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