yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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