Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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