you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
