im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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