I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
