Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
