Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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