Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
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