Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
