I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
