Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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