I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Randomize
