I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize