If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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