Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
