Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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