also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
