do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Randomize
