Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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