God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
