If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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