It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
