can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Randomize
