i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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